Facebook to Track Shower Data

6 Dec

Facebook is once again on the defensive against privacy advocacy groups after announcing it will begin tracking user shower data.

The popular social networking site made its plans public after successful beta testing in selected company showers.  Users in the test showers shared data about whistling versus singing, washcloth versus luffa preference, and frequency of hair conditioning.

Privacy advocacy groups like StopFBshower.org are arguing that Facebook only wants to monitor shower data to learn information like preferred user shampoo brands for targeted advertising.

Facebook denies this claim, and is arguing that the practice isn’t an invasion of privacy because users explicitly agree to shower monitoring when creating a Facebook account.

“Relax.  We really only want to know: how long you’re showering, when, where, and why you’re showering, and who you’re showering with, to get sort of an all around picture of the user-shower experience,” said a Facebook publicity manager.

Public opinion seems split on the issue.  Half of Internet users surveyed said it was a great idea, and the other half were too lazy to respond to the survey.

“I think it’s spectacular.  I’m tired of shower talk being taboo, because it’s really important that my friends know how often I shave my legs.  It’s the kind of stuff I’m sure people want to know about me,” said avid status updater Celia Andrews.

Knewscorp recently caught up with CEO and founder Mark Zuckerberg after a press conference and asked why he wanted to peep on users in the shower:

“Showering is an extremely human phenomenon.  What you do in the shower says a lot about who you are as a person and can really inform a social network about your interests and hobbies.  We just want to make the world more connected.” responded Zuckerberg.

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